Alone in the journey

I don’t know what it is but lately I’ve been mentally battling myself a lot lately. I’ve been debating on this whole clean eating and fitness lifestyle that I’ve been maintaining. It’s weird because I go through times where it’s so easy to stick with the program and then others like the last couple of weeks where I just want to stop doing it. I go through these funks where I don’t know if it’s worth it.

The hardest part is feeling alone in the process. I feel like I’m the only one battling this. No matter what I do I feel guilty lately. If I eat the pizza, guilty. If I don’t eat the pizza, guilty. I’m having a hard time finding the happy medium where I’m eating healthier, exercising, but not stressing about it. I’ve said it before, but weight loss is more a mental game than anything physical.

Here’s why I get frustrated… Why do I have to watch what I eat and exercise to get skinny when there are people out there who don’t do any of it and they have the perfect bodies? Sure I can tell myself that I’m not doing it be skinny and just because those people are skinny doesn't mean they are healthy, but do I believe it?

Here’s what I decided to do. I've made a list of all my goals, the reason why I want to accomplish them, and what could try to hold me back. Seeing the visual of them will hopefully keep me more motivated to keep going for something that I've worked at so hard for so long.

1.       Get down to my ultimate goal weight safely. 

a.       It’s more than just a number. It’s a medal of honor in a sense, telling me that I can follow through with something that is a battle every single day and be victorious. I've gone into my weight loss journey with the idea that using any type of “weight loss supplement” was not going to happen. I will admit that at times I've been tempted to try them to get over my plateau, but I refuse. I’ll do this 100% on my own.

b.      The only thing that will stop me at this point would be my self-control. I need to stay away from certain foods that I know I have no control around and practice better portion control.

2.       Become the strongest version of myself.

a.       I want to physically be strong. I want to have muscle definition and I want people to look at me and now that I’m a hard worker.

b.      I will need to continue to try new workouts and mix it up every now and then to shock my muscles. I won’t let myself get comfortable in the gym.

3.       Help inspire others to become better people.

a.       I want to help others be stronger, lose weight, smarter in their food decisions, less self-conscious, and overall happier people.

b.      Feeling like people are judging me for it. I know people are always going to have something to say, but I need to stop letting it bug me. From this moment on, people who want judge me or talk down on my lifestyle can suck it :) 

I hope this article has in some way helped people understand that it’s okay to doubt yourself and second guess why you are on this journey. It’s okay as long as you don’t give into your doubt. Always remember why you started and what it means for your overall well-being. Some people are lucky and never have to deal with weight loss, but everyone should be aware of what is going in to their body whether you are fat or skinny. As long as healthy decisions are being made more frequently then unhealthy you should be proud of your progress. I've made some good points, now it’s time for me to start following my own advice :) I've come a long ways and I'll never forget it. This article has helped myself realize that I need to stop stressing so much and enjoy the journey.