My life- What made me choose the healthy life.

I've gone through a lot in the past 8 years and I am hoping some of my experiences can help someone else out there. 8 years ago I was married. I got pregnant and miscarried about 3 months after we wed. During our time together I was pregnant twice and miscarried twice. It took 4 years between pregnancies to become pregnant. I went through so many doctors and no one could tell me why. Finally, I got an answer. I have Polycystic Ovarian Syndrome, PCOS. That explained so many things like my weight gain in a short amount of time, my hairyness, acne, mood swings, etc. From the beginning my marriage was far from perfect, in fact, it was miserable. We were not compatible at all and towards the end I began to see how emotionally abusive he really was. I never had a support system with him which I see now is so important to have. I had to take control of my life and the first thing I had to do was leave him. The day I left, I vowed to never let my life get so out of control ever again. Since then I have lost 140 pounds, became way healthier, and I am happier than I have ever been. For once, I loved myself and that allowed me to find someone who loves me for me. I am now newly married to the man of dreams :) Nate has been such a trooper through it all including my moodiness, fertility treatments that we are just starting, me testing out new PCOS friendly recipes (some delicious, others not so much), and my somewhat obsessive macro/calorie counting and workout obsession. 


As Nate and I were dating, the subject of starting a family came up. I was going to my annual exam and needed to make a decision on starting birth control or not. We decided that we'd like to start a family, even though we were not married yet ( I know it's a sin, right?!) In November 2013, we found out I was pregnant. We were so excited! In December 2013 I miscarried, again. So 3 pregnancies, 3 losses. I felt completely helpless. Nate was amazing throughout it and it only made me realize even more that he was perfect for me. I was mad because I was sure that losing over 100 pounds and being overall healthy would make this pregnancy stick and it didn't. Honestly, I wanted to quit being healthy and go back to eating crap and being lazy. That lasted about a week and then I decided that my health was one of the very few things that I personally had control of. Since then I have researched more into food, hormones, exercise, etc and I feel that I'm well on my way to a successful pregnancy because of the smart choices I've been making. 


You see, to me being healthy and losing weight is not about looking good. I need to be healthy on the inside to get what I want more than anything in this world, to be a mom. For all of us, staying healthy should always be about something bigger than just looking good.  I'm passionate about health and fitness because it has literally changed and saved my life.